Tips for Being Quiet
Dr. Dale V. Atkins, May 2013
Many of us talk more than necessary. The downside of talking too much is that we don't listen as well as we could. When we are quiet and focused on listening, our relationships improve dramatically because what comes across is our desire to be present with this other person and to consider their experience and perspective.
Generally, people who are quiet think before acting and are less impulsive when making decisions. Quiet people tend to have a calming effect on others and can help sooth difficult situations. They select their words wisely, leading others to want to work with them and trust their judgment.
Consider these tips in your efforts to be more quiet:
Try to find quiet within yourself by quieting your mind a few minutes every day.
Be Silent for Some Portion of Every Day. Resist talking on the phone as you walk or drive. Just allow yourself to feel the quiet and observe your surroundings.
As you consider what you do in your spare time, contemplate developing a hobby that does not require you to speak.
Before you speak, focus on the other person, with the goal of understanding them and their perspective.
Notice your own and the other person's body language and pay attention to what messages are behind the words before you comment.
Be aware of interrupting. Few things are more disrespectful than interrupting someone when they are expressing their feelings and thoughts.
Speak loud enough to be heard. Shouting conveys underlying meanings that can derail your attempts to connect.
Avoid speaking when it is not necessary.