Sanity SaversTM and More...
July 2007


For many people, July represents the warm and lazy days of summer. July 4th celebrations, swimming pools and beaches come to mind.

For others, life does not seem to slow down at all, especially when the kids are off from school. Working men and women sometimes struggle to balance both professional and personal obligations.

Balancing Work And Family: A Challenge for Women AND Men discusses the unique issues men face in their decision to commit more time to their families.

In this month's tips, Self-Care Tips for Caregivers, I offer ideas to stay clear of burnout, hopelessness and extreme fatigue, and preserving sanity for those of us involved in long term care for someone dear to us (a parent, sibling, child, spouse).

Check my website, www.drdaleatkins.com for updates on my appearances related to my new book, Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life. I am proud to be a member of the Westin Renewal Council, whose purpose is to help people live the best life wherever they are. Please click Westin Renewal Council for some personal renewal tips. And if you would like me to speak to your group or organization, please contact me directly at dale@drdaleatkins.com or contact the Speakers' Bureau at HarperCollins.

I appreciate you sharing this newsletter with your friends, loved ones and colleagues by clicking Send to a Friend button below.

Wishing you health, peace and balance.


In this issue
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    Now In Bookstores!
  • Sanity SaversTM
    Balancing Work and Family: A Challenge for Women AND Men
  • Happenings
  • Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
  • Sanity SaversTM TIPS
    Self-Care Tips for Caregivers
    Avoiding Burnout
  • A Thought

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    Now In Bookstores!
    SS Book Cover

    SANITY SAVERS: Tips for Women to Live A Balanced Life is out in bookstores and is filled with suggestions to save your sanity every day of the week.

    A must for any woman seeking to find her balance!

    Sanity SaversTM
    Balancing Work and Family: A Challenge for Women AND Men

    Now, more than ever, men are involved in the day to day lives of their families. They make choices to spend more time at home or to stay home entirely, actively participating in and contributing to child care and housework. Their desire to be a part of the family instead of apart from the family factors into more and more men's considerations regarding career and job opportunities, expectations and financial rewards and benefits as well as their overall life satisfaction.

    We are in a transition time. We are not yet where we need to be so that men and women can benefit from the support and empathy they can offer each other as they both share in the creation of their family lives. Many companies do not appear to appreciative the value of having workers who are balanced in their home/work lives and have yet to send a message that someone whose family life is in good shape is a much better worker. The women's movement of the 1960s encouraged women to pursue their desires, enter the work force, design and forge careers and roles began to change. There was more shared parenting. There was, however, not a comparable men's movement to articulate the desires of men in the same way.

    Whatever prompts the wake up call, men are discovering the undeniable satisfaction and joy when they become more fully involved and more fully committed to their families. Not every man is going to become a stay at home dad but more and more men are deciding not to accept after work assignments or are choosing work where they will have the opportunities to spend time with their families. They, their partners and their children benefit from this shift.

    What may have worked for previous generations may no longer apply.


    TODAY Show (NBC)
    Today -Weekend Edition
    Please check the website www.drdaleatkins.com for updated listings.

    New Morning Show
    Please check website www.drdaleatkins.com for updated listings.
    Hallmark Channel, 7:00am

    The Premier Women's Blogging Site: Sanity Savers

    The Lisa Birnbach Radio Show
    Dr. Dale's Sanity Savers
    Every other Wed., 9:15-10:00am
    July 5th: Guest Host
    July 11th
    July 25th
    The Lisa Birnbach Show airs LIVE Mon-Fri 9am- Noon EST

    Manhattan Mothers of Twins
    July 31st: 8-9pm: Topic: Taking Care of Yourself and Your Relationship with Your Partner
    St Bart's Church, Community House, East 50th St., NYC

    Please see also my article on Caregivers in this month's issue of AARP Magazine at http://www.aarpmagazine.org/family/caregiving/setting_limits__just_how_much_should_we_do_for_our.html

    Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit

    Some days you can feel your mood drop. When you can't get outdoors, feel overwhelmed with too many things, or can't focus on any one thing, your upbeat outlook may wane.

    Instead of reaching for a drink or comfort food, move your body. Depending on how you feel and what you need, moving will help relase the "happy hormones" that will contribute to saving your sanity as you improve your mood.

    Simple movement can help you to manage how you feel.

    Sanity SaversTM TIPS
    Self-Care Tips for Caregivers
    Avoiding Burnout

    There are two realities when it comes to caregiving for a loved one with an illness. One is that this role can be a rewarding, life-changing experience for the caregiver and can make a world of difference to the person who is ill. The other is that every caregiver is a candidate for burnout, and some feel it more severely than others.

    While many caregivers do cope well with stress and do not experience dramatic changes in their lives, others may be more susceptible to burnout. Recognizing common sources of burnout and proactively taking steps to minimize their effects is an important contribution toward self-care. You are no good for someone else if you are no good for yourself.

    The secret is to stay balanced and give to yourself while caregiving for another person. When you do this, you will be less likely to experience extreme burnout. Here are some tips to keep in mind to help you.

    • Live in the Moment - Stay in the moment and have hope. By staying in the moment and seeing each day as a series of connected events, you can navigate through even the toughest situations.
    • Set Goals and Have a Plan- Having a plan that you can rely on helps to fend off frustration, depression and sense of hopelessness that is typical of burnout. Being prepared is the best defense. Do this by sharing as many responsibilities as possible with family members, friends, and professionals.
    • Develop Strategies for Coping-Review the strategies you have used before in other situations. Assess their value to you now and determine if alternative ways to deal with stress are in order. Don't forget to laugh and see the humor in some of the most bizarre situations.
    • Keep Roles in Perspective- If you are a caregiver for a parent, it is wise to recognize that your roles do not reverse. Your parent remains your parent, and deserves to be treated with respect, even if you are in charge of feeding or bathing him or her.
    • Concentrate on Your Own Health-Eat healthfully, exercise daily, meditate or do a relaxation exercise that reminds you to incorporate "mindful, restorative breathing" throughout the day, which helps you to sleep more soundly.
    • Join a Support Group -Not only does this help with feelings of isolation, it connects you with others who are experiencing similar day to day events and feelings. Nobody's situation is EXACTLY like yours but there are folks who are similar situations who can help you emotionally and spiritually. And, believe it or not, you can help others in the process.
    • Care for yourself as well as for the person who depends on you.

    A Thought

    The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live.

    Leo Buscaglia

    DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist, lecturer and commentator in the media who appears on the Today show.

    She has more than twenty- five years of experience and focuses on living a balanced life, parenting, aging well, managing stress, life & work transitions, family connections and healthy relationships.

    Dr. Atkins is the author and/or co-editor of several books including:

  • Sisters
  • From the Heart:
    Men and Women Write Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives
  • Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children
  • I'm OK, You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger and Create a Relationship that Works
  • Wedding Sanity Savers
    How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes and Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect Day.
  • And her new book . . .

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • .

    Find out more....
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