Sanity SaversTM and More...
December 2007


How did the holidays come upon us so fast? The turmoil of the holiday season is here! It's a joyous as well as chaotic time filled with guests, activities, and lots and lots of details. Santa's not the only one with lists. We rush around and are more susceptible to stress so be sure to save your sanity during the holidays. Take special moments so you can be mindful of the spirit of the holidays to be sure the warmth and opportunities for pleasure come through.

Pace yourself, be sure you make time to relax and absorb all of the wonderful memories you'll be creating as you celebrate the holidays and enter 2008. Be present when you are with friends and family and focus on the good you have in your life. Know that you will need Patience and Perseverance to get through not only the holidays but also whatever may be happening in your life at this time so pay close attention to ways you can develop your patience as you persevere along your path.

Because many of us are hosting guests at the holidays it is important that you are mindful of what you need as well as what they need when you are sharing your home. Surviving the Holidays will help you think about ways to manage and enjoy opportunities when guests are in your home.

Once again thank you for helping to get the word out about Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life (perfect for the holidays.)

Check my website, www.drdaleatkins.com for updates on my appearances related to my newest book, Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life. I am proud to be a member of the Westin Renewal Council, whose purpose is to help people live the best life wherever they are. Please click Westin Renewal Council for some personal renewal tips. And if you would like me to speak to your group or organization, please contact me directly at dale@drdaleatkins.com or contact the Speakers' Bureau at HarperCollins.

I appreciate you sharing this newsletter with your friends, loved ones and colleagues by clicking Send to a Friend button below.

Wishing you a Happy Hannukah, Merry Christmas, Joyous Kwanzaa, General Holiday Joy and Happy New Year along with health, peace and balance in 2008.


In this issue
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    In Bookstores!
  • Sanity SaversTM
    Patience and Perseverance
  • Happenings
  • Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
  • Sanity SaversTM TIPS
    Surviving Your Holidays:
    Guests Who Disturb Your Peace
  • A Thought

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    In Bookstores!
    SS Book Cover

    SANITY SAVERS: Tips for Women to Live A Balanced Life is in bookstores and is filled with suggestions to save your sanity every day of the year.

    A must for any woman seeking to find her balance!

    Sanity SaversTM
    Patience and Perseverance

    These are both the watchwords and the lessons.

    You are diagnosed with a challenging illness. You are having a difficult time with a relative or someone at work. Your financial situation is really tough and the holidays are here and you want to buy great presents but don't know how without going into debt. You are waiting for your new career to take off and it just hasn't matched your fantasy time table.

    Make a plan and then see how you want to see it to fruition, understanding that most plans become altered along the way because that is what happens in life. Things change and we need to adapt.

    When something is really important to you, understand that it may not be that important to someone else. That does not mean that YOU are not important so don't take it personally. Sometimes, you must be patient and wait till someone gets around to reading your resume, or your proposal, or returning your phone call. And sometimes, you need to persevere and help yourself get to the top of their list. Some people need to have a little "nudge" from time to time to keep what is important to you on their radar screen. So that is what this is also about: keeping what we know is important in the forefront so other people see why it is important. And then it becomes important to them too.

    Whatever you are facing, remember there is always an ebb and flow. Understand this deep in your soul so you can have clarity about when to relax and when to push. It is all about Patience and Perseverance.


    TODAY Show (NBC)
    December 8th: Marriage

    New Morning Show
    December 17th: 7AM: Mending
    Hallmark Channel

    Getting Your Money's Worth, hosted by Judith West
    December 6th: 2:45PM
    Good News Broadcasting, Time Warner Cable Channel 34 (or channel 78), RCN 83, and live streaming on the Web at MNN.org at 8:30 am on Sunday mornings.

    The Real Life Survivor Guide, hosted by Bruce Barber
    December 9th: 3PM: College Kids Coming Home for Holidays

    WNPR Connecticut Public Radio, www.wnpr.org, and www.rlsguide.com

    Sisterhood of Temple B'nai Abraham
    December 4th: 11:30AM: Speaker, Stress Management
    Livingston, NJ

    Women's Executive Roundtable
    December 6th: 11:30AM -12:30PM: Featured Speaker, Sanity Savers for the Holidays
    Marriott East Side Hotel, New York, NY

    St. Louis Jewish Book Fair
    December 17th: 8PM
    St. Louis, MO

    See article on Sanity Savers in the November, 2007 issue of Black Tie

    Dr. Dale is featured in the December, 2007 issue of Westport Magazine, p. 70

    Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit

    Practice Gratitude

    It is easy to overlook the good things in your life, especially when you feel overwhelmed with challenges. Taking time out daily to think about the things you are grateful for in your life can help reset your outlook on life.

    "Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow." -Melody Beattie

    Sanity SaversTM TIPS
    Surviving Your Holidays:
    Guests Who Disturb Your Peace

    Sometimes hosting brings along with it the need to have people stay with you who not only are inconsiderate guests but are people who annoy you, get under your skin, or are staying with you because of an obligation you feel to invite them for the holidays.

    Whatever the reason, you may find that you have a person (or people) in your "inner sanctum." Maybe you feel as if being in your own home on the holidays is exactly where you want to be but you are not so thrilled with ALL of the folks who are coming home for the holidays. Or maybe you would be thrilled if they were there for part of the time. Your home is often your very own sanctuary where you look forward to getting away from the stresses of everyday life and now you fear you are going to be invaded. In fact, what you now realize is that one of the major stressors in your life has taken up residency in your guest room going through your things. What to do?

    Consider these tips:

    • Find Downtime - Do something that you enjoy, find relaxing, restorative, or nurturing. Make time for yourself at both the beginning and end of the day so you can treat yourself to a calming meditation, a quiet walk, some time in the garden or in an aromatic tub. Recharging your battery is important when you have someone in your space who disturbs the peace.
    • Plan Ahead - Try to plan events where you are with the person in small doses. Enlist other guests to "entertain" this particular person so you do not have full time responsibility. Be willing to include other people who are easy to be with to take away some of the pressure. Consider doing chores with the person such as giving them part of your list for items at the market. They will feel useful and you will benefit from their help.
    • Schedule Events - Have a schedule of events and stick to it as best you can. Changing activities and venues allows you to be engaged with your guests while alleviating some of the predictable stress.
    • Overlook Criticisms - If they criticize your space, your interior decoration, the fact that the plumbing sings when the shower is on remind them that this is your refuge and you like it as it is but understand it can be a challenge to those who are not used to it. You may think ducking your head to get into the dormer bedroom is quaint but your tall houseguest may wonder how many bruises he will have when he leaves.

      You can endure the not-so-perfect guest. It may be helpful to consider this time with guests as learning opportunities about yourself and others, adding a whole new level of tolerance and dimension to your relationships.

    A Thought

    What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

    Ralph Waldo Emerson

    DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist, lecturer and commentator in the media who appears on the Today show.

    She has more than twenty- five years of experience and focuses on living a balanced life, parenting, aging well, managing stress, life & work transitions, family connections and healthy relationships.

    Dr. Atkins is the author and/or co-editor of several books including:

  • Sisters
  • From the Heart:
    Men and Women Write Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives
  • Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children
  • I'm OK, You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger and Create a Relationship that Works
  • Wedding Sanity Savers
    How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes and Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect Day.
  • And her new book . . .

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • .

    Find out more....
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