Sanity SaversTM and More...
April 2012

Greetings for the upcoming holidays!

In Specific Steps to Model Charity, I encourage you to think about pragmatic ways to model a charitable "mindset and heartset" within your family.

In Tips for Generating Good Things, I ask you to think about your life and how you can "create" something meaningful that will be gratifying for you.

WE CAN ALL ADDRESS THE LITERACY CRISIS IN THIS COUNTRY. Jumpstart is a national early education nonprofit organization that pairs well-trained, caring adults with underserved preschoolers who live in poverty in year long mentoring relationships. I was honored to be Jumpstart's Read for the Record's National Spokesperson on NBC's Today Show this past Fall and to have moderated a panel of Jumpstart's founders on February 22nd at the Yale Club in NYC. Jumpstart's Scribbles to Novels www.jstart.org/scribblesnyc, event will take place on Tuesday, May 8th at 6:30pm at Cipriani Wall Street. Join Tina Fey and other acclaimed and entertaining authors to celebrate the written word and support Jumpstart's programming in New York City and around the country. For more information, contact Melissa Gordon: 212.868.2526 212.868.2526 x16 or melissa.gordon@jstart.org.

Thank you for helping to spread the word about the mission of Jumpstart and the remarkable strides being made in low income neighborhoods every day. We need your help, so please, if you can, contribute by clicking on www.jstart.org/donate www.jstart.org/donate. There is something that every single one of us can do to help those less fortunate. Over one million children live below the poverty level in the U.S. This shameful situation must change. Each of us has a responsibility to repair our world. Let us eliminate the 2-year achievement gap that exists between children from low income and those from middle income neighborhoods when they begin kindergarten!

Visit www.jstart.org to learn more about Jumpstart initiatives - such as Scribbles to Novels; Playdate With A Purpose; and Read for the Record.

You may be interested to visit Marlo Thomas' website, www.marlothomas.com, where I discuss psychology and relationship issues. Marlo Thomas and I talk about families and the holidays (and we surely have a lot of holidays!). Tune in for some sanity saving ideas for YOUR family gatherings.

Once again thank you for continuing to read and talk about Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life.

Check my website, www.drdaleatkins.com for updates on my appearances and use the Quick Links sidebar to access ongoing articles. I am available to speak to your group or organization. Please contact me directly at dale@drdaleatkins.com or contact the Speakers' Bureau at HarperCollins.

I appreciate you sharing this newsletter with your friends, loved ones, and colleagues by clicking Send to a Friend button below.

Wishing you health, peace and balance.


In this issue
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • Sanity SaversTM
    Specific Steps to Model Charity
  • Happenings
  • Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
  • Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips For Generating Good Things
  • A Thought

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    SS Book Cover

    SANITY SAVERS: Tips for Women to Live A Balanced Life is filled with suggestions to save your sanity every day of the year.

    A must for any woman seeking to find her balance!

    Sanity SaversTM
    Specific Steps to Model Charity
    children donating

    People generally rise to the occasion when there are significant and major disasters. There are, however, so many people in need of help on a full time basis. Easing children into becoming charitable is one positive act we can take to encourage a child to be engaged in a lifetime of service.

    After filling up your charity boxes load them into the car and deliver them with your children. You might have to do a little research to decide where to give your toys - things that are new and in their packages can go to Toys for Tots, toys that are not new but are still in good shape can go to a local shelter, religious organization, or other relief groups. Thrift stores supported by such organizations as Goodwill and Salvation Army often sell toys to raise money for their other activities, which means that you cannot be sure a needy child will receive your child's toys. If you cannot find any other local program, there are worthy alternatives.

    With an afternoon's work - and family togetherness - you can teach valuable lessons to your children while assisting someone else's children at the same time.

    To help your children develop the habit of being conscious of charity, consider implementing these family strategies:

    1.) Periodically go through your closets; sort through clothes you haven't worn in a while, clothes you haven't worn in awhile to be distributed to those in need. Encourage your children to do the same. Allow them to select which clothes or toys they wish to donate. The value of this activity is lost if you go through their closets for them without them. For maximum benefit, involve your children in choosing the appropriate items. Take your children with you when you make the donation.

    2.) Regularly engage in a service oriented project. Rake the leaves for an elderly couple. Bake cookies to send overseas to a serviceman or servicewoman. If you and your children are musical, offer to perform at a local assisted living facility. Bake bread and deliver to your local homeless food station.

    3.) Give blood. Bring your children with you so they see you as a model for giving. Talk to them about why you choose to donate blood and what you hope it will accomplish.

    4.) Set up birthday parties as a time for giving to others. At your child's first school age birthday party, ask guests to bring a gift of a book (new or used) to be donated to a local library or school in a low income neighborhood. Talk to your child about the books (s)he has and about children who don't have any books. Explain that one way to celebrate a birthday would be to give to those who have less. Involve the birthday boy or girl in the decision of where to donate: a woman's shelter, a doctor's office, etc. When you deliver the books with your child, take a picture.

    5.) At regular intervals, buy dog or cat food and take it to the humane society. Allow your children to spend some time with the recipients of the gift.

    6.) Build food baskets around the holidays and give to a needy family suggested by your religious institution, community center, or school. Involve your children is selecting healthy food: canned goods, fruit and other treats to include. Decorate the gift package and deliver it together, as a family.

    7.) Create a charity jar to be used by the family when allowances are distributed. Invite children to share some of their allowance with others through donating to the jar. As the jar fills decide as a family where to contribute the contents. You may choose to save a whale or contribute to a cancer charity that collects hats for kids receiving chemotherapy. Read about various charities on the internet and share this information with your children to focus and to help them make an informed decision.

    8.) Get on a regular service schedule at your church, temple or mosque. Sign up for a time to trim the bushes, serve a community breakfast, Take your turn ushering and allow your child to assist.

    By implementing some of these and other ideas we can teach children that charity is not reserved only for emergencies. You will be helping them appreciate that reaching out to others in need is a way of life, rather than a moment in time when a catastrophic disaster occurs. Remember, while you are giving to others, you are giving your children important lessons about your beliefs concerning the spirit of giving, generosity, and being part of a community.


    TODAY Show (NBC)
    Please check website, www.drdaleatkins.com, for latest updates, including changes of time.

    CREC Soundbridge, American School for the Deaf, and the New England Center for Hearing Rehabilitation
    April 28th: 10AM - 1:30PM. Speaker, Topic: Coping With The Stresses Of Having A Young Child With Hearing Loss.
    CREC Soundbridge, 123 Progress Drive, Wethersfield, CT 06109. Lunch included.
    Parents and family members attend free. Professionals' fee: $40. CEU's offered, both State and LSLS.

    Jumpstart's Scribbles to Novels www.jstart.org/scribblesnyc
    May 8th: 6:30pm;
    Join Tina Fey and other acclaimed and entertaining authors to celebrate the written word and support Jumpstart's programming in New York City and around the country.
    At Cipriani Wall Street. For more information, contact Melissa Gordon: 212.868.2526 212.868.2526 x16 or melissa.gordon@jstart.org.

    Dr. Atkins is also the focus of an article, Work, Life, Balance, written by James Reisler. The article will appear in the December 2011 issue of TC Today Magazine. A PDF of the article will be available on www.drdaleatkins.com mid-December.

    Topics by Dr. Dale Atkins:
    Tips for Getting Along with In-Laws: http://video.about.com/marriage/Tips-for-Getting-Along-With-In-Laws.htm;
    Warning Signs of a Troubled Marriage: http://video.about.com/marriage/Warning-Signs-of-a-Troubled-Marriage.htm;
    Issues to Deal with before Marriage: http://video.about.com/marriage/Types-of-Issues-to-Deal-With-Before-Getting-Married.htm;
    Warning Signs of Cheating Spouse: http://video.about.com/marriage/Warning-Signs-of-Cheating-Spouses.htm; Tips for Maintaining Interfaith Marriages: http://video.about.com/marriage/Tips-for-Maintaining-Interfaith-Marriages.htm;
    Tips for Growing Old Together
    and, Most Important Questions to Ask Before Getting Married: http://video.about.com/marriage/Most-Important-Questions-to-Ask-Before-Getting-Married.htm

    Visit Marlo Thomas' site to access my relationship column and Mondays with Marlo video stream. http://marlothomas.aol.com/search/?q=dale+atkins

    Read Dr. Atkins' chapter, "Therapeutic Issues with Recipients of Cochlear Implants," in the new text, Psychotherapy With Deaf Clients From Diverse Groups, Second Edition.
    Edited by Irene Leigh, and published by Gallaudet University Press.

    Read Dr. Atkins' chapter, "Family Involvement and Counseling in Serving Children Who Possess Impaired Hearing," in the new text, Introduction to Aural Rehabilitation.
    Edited by Raymond H. Hull, and published by Plural Publishing.

    I invite you to visit my website to access archives of articles and interviews on line.

    Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
    tai chi

    Investigate Something From a Different Perspective

    As difficult as it may be, pretend you are in a debate class and you MUST make a strong case for a particular issue. Force yourself to understand an issue from the opposite point of view from your usual stance. Step away from your familiar "track". Read a contrary political blog, listen to a media commentator whose social perspective is different from yours and try to hear his or her point of view. Pay attention to your visceral response but then remember your mission: to convince someone of your "new" point of view.

    Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips For Generating Good Things

    Generativity is all about generating good things. Generativity is giving birth and there are many ways to give birth; to people, projects, ideas; making music, art; starting a company, tutoring a child, creating a solution to a problem. Generativity is also about caring for things, people, and places with the next generation in mind.

    As people enter their middle adult years and become more conscious of growing older, those who do so with consciousness, grace, style and purpose focus more on the growing and less on the old. They think about the life they lived and the legacy they leave and they come to appreciate "I am what survives me."

    Leave a Part of Yourself Behind. - Consider what your "footprint in the sand", your "mark on the world", your "message", your "legacy", will be; what it will say about you.

    Accept That We Will Not Live Forever. - We accept that we will not live forever (not in this lifetime, anyway) and we hope to have an impact for the future.

    So take some time, reflect on where you are in the world and how your thoughts, feelings, and actions can have an impact on what comes after you.

    A Thought

    "If you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others."

    Dr. Haim Ginott

    DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist, lecturer and commentator in the media who appears on the Today show.

    She has more than twenty- five years of experience and focuses on living a balanced life, parenting, aging well, managing stress, life & work transitions, family connections and healthy relationships.

    Dr. Atkins is the author and/or co-editor of several books including:

  • Sisters
  • From the Heart:
    Men and Women Write Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives
  • Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children
  • I'm OK, You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger and Create a Relationship that Works
  • Wedding Sanity Savers
    How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes and Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect Day.
  • And her newest book . . .

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • .

    Find out more....
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